


Trust In The Dark

by idrilhadhafang



Category: Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: 5 + 1, 5 Times, Childhood Friends, Fluff, M/M, Nothing Happens Until They’re Both of Age, Rating May Change, Sexual Content In Chapter Four, Sharing a Bed, Sleepovers, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Warnings May Change
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-05
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-05 03:42:00
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25087834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/idrilhadhafang/pseuds/idrilhadhafang
Summary: Five times Ben and Poe shared a bed, and one time they didn’t.
Relationships: Poe Dameron/Ben Solo, Poe Dameron/Ben Solo | Kylo Ren
Comments: 12
Kudos: 9
Collections: The Darkpilot Library





	1. Sleepover

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The first time they share a bed, they’re children, and they’re at a sleepover. It’s not really a big deal, Ben thinks; after all, Poe’s his best friend, and he trusts him more than anything. Ben’s only five and Poe’s only eight, but he knows Poe wouldn’t do anything to hurt him, even though the Voice worries about it. 

(After all, Ben thinks, the Voice isn’t perfect)

”I really like your bed,” Poe says, flopping on Ben’s bed comfortably. “Is it like this all the time? You being rich?”

Ben frowns. Is he rich? He hasn’t really thought about that. 

Poe chatters on. He’s a chatterbox, Ben thinks, but he doesn’t mind. He talks at lightspeed, but Ben finds that it’s almost soothing background noise. Not a big deal. “I’m not very rich,” he says. “Mama and Papa say we’re middle-class. Did soldiers in the Rebellion get paid?”

(Ben makes a note to ask Mrs. Bey about it. And Mr. Dameron)

”No idea,” Ben says. “I don’t mind. About you being rich or not.”

”I don’t mind either!” Poe says, beaming. “I mean, I like my house. I like yours too, though; it’s big. I can imagine there are secret passages there...”

Ben grins excitedly. “Maybe we could check them out sometime!”

”Yeah!”

There’s something about just talking about mysteries and stuff with Poe that makes Ben, almost, not fear the nightmares that come when the room is dark. 

Then Poe says, “You know, on Yavin, Mama says that I was born on top of a Sith temple. Exar Kun’s. You think...you don’t think I’ll be a Sith, do you?”

”No!” Ben exclaims. “There’s not a bit of darkness in you. And nobody better mess with you or I’ll fight them off!”

Poe grins, delighted. “Same with you.” Then, “You think I’ll be Force Sensitive like you?”

”Uncle Luke and Mommy say anyone can be a Jedi." Ben says. “You should be able to too.”

He wants it. He wants Poe to be as part of the magic of the Force as he is. To feel everything, to be one with everything. Poe’s his friend, and he doesn’t want Poe to get jealous. He wants Poe to be happy. After all, friends want that, don’t they?

”Thanks. I hope so.” Then, chirping, like Poe does, “But I can still help you, Ben! Maybe I’ll be the pilot and you’ll be the Jedi and we can fight evil together.”

Ben grins. “Yeah! And you’ll be the bestest pilot ever!”

”And you’ll be the best Jedi ever!”

Ben hopes so. More than anything he does. And yet, he thinks, with Poe, he can believe everything and anything. 

The Voice doesn’t come that night. Maybe it’s scared. Ben's at least grateful for the lack of bad dreams. 


	2. Support

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing. 
> 
> Author’s Notes: Call this a therapy thing.

The second time it happens, Ben is eighteen and Poe is twenty-one, and they’re heading back from Kijimi. 

There’s something about Poe lying next to him that makes Ben realize, with a jolt, that he could have lost him. That he never could have gotten him back. That Kes would have to deal with a lost son. (He hopes he never does that to anyone. Not that he blames Poe. Poe made a mistake, after all)

With the nightmare lurking in the back of his head (shadows and hands and Poe’s screaming, being forced to hear it echoing in the caverns of his head) it only makes Ben want to hold Poe all the more and not let him go. To protect him...even from himself. 

(Ben doesn’t know for sure, but he has a feeling that he’s the monster)

Poe’s exhausted. Ben runs hands over his hair, and it dawns on him how precious Poe really is. How valuable. And he doesn’t know. Even Poe devalues himself...

He can’t close his eyes. He has to focus on Poe, on thick, curly black hair framing his face, the slight smile on his lips that Ben wonders what it would be like if they —

He won’t. Of course. Because he is a gentleman, and would never hurt Poe even though the dreams want him to. 

He may be a monster, but even this monster, a boy with a hidden evil side — even this monster can love, and take solace in the moment. 


	3. Solace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The third time they share a bed, it’s more sharing a couch. Ben’s been there for Poe when he’s tried to redeem himself about being a spice runner. Now it’s Poe’s turn. 

Ben’s learned about his grandfather being Vader. And Poe — he can’t think of anything besides the fact that he’s outraged that Ransolm Casterfo would humiliate Leia like that. Poe doesn’t want his friends to be humiliated in any way; Poe wants his friends to be happy. 

He wants Ben to be happy. Ben is a wonderful man, a man with a smile like brilliant moonlight and a heart that is bigger than people give it credit for. Poe wants to mend the latter and see the former. To not have the shadow of Vader over his dear friend. If not more. 

Poe thought it was curiosity, marveling at how the skinny kid he knew had grown so muscular and strong and beautiful. But it’s more than that, especially when Poe wants to protect him. He wants to be his own Jedi Knight, his bodyguard, even though sometimes he wonders if he has much to give. Ben’s slumped against his shoulder, clearly exhausted. Poe knows that he should take Ben back to the Academy, like a selfless man would, but even at twenty-six, he’s bad at being selfless. He knows it. He wants this man happy. Even when he gives all he can give, is he selfless enough? Is he good enough? 

He puts a hand on Ben’s shoulder, as much as he can reach — Ben is bigger and stronger than him, belying the fact he can’t always do this on his own. “I got you,” he says. “I’m not gonna leave you.”

There’s nothing Ben could say or do that would make Poe hate him. 


	4. Sex

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Disclaimer: I own nothing.

The fourth time they share a bed, it’s when they make love for the first time. Ben’s twenty-three, Poe’s twenty-six, and they’re trying to figure out what feels good. 

They’re mostly worshipping the other, on Ben’s bed, in his hut, and Poe’s on top of Ben. (It’s a compromise. Ben’s been afraid of crushing him because in comparison to Poe, Ben is just so big. Even that crucial body difference makes Poe shudder with delight even as he moves down Ben’s body)

”Kriff,” Ben groans. “I didn’t think it was that...sensitive. My body.”

”It tends to be that way.” Poe can remember testing out self-pleasuring, what fantasies got him off, what felt good. He tried to think of beings of all genders, but Ben kept popping up. "Just...guide me. I don’t know your body. If anything bothers you, tell me.”

Ben laughs, a bit strained. “Poe, you could be using your nose and I wouldn’t mind.”

Poe finds that his lover’s very enthusiastic. When Poe stimulates his lover’s nipples, kissing them, rubbing them to hardness, biting and sucking, he finds that Ben's gasping, arching beneath him. “Kriff, I love this, I love you...”

”Because I’m making you feel good?” Poe teases. 

Ben snorts. “I’d love you anyway.” He whimpers as Poe licks a stripe down the flat expanse of his upper belly, kisses and bites at the softer, more adorable part of his lower belly. 

”Force, Poe...”

”Gods, look at you,” Poe whispers. “So powerful and strong. So beautiful. It’s going to be a treat kriffing you.”

Ben seems to be soaking in the praise. He’s so cruel to himself, Poe thinks. He’s just going to take care of his beloved however he can. He takes his time to worship Ben’s powerful legs — strong, gorgeous legs. Ben’s built like an apex predator but just needs praise and affection, just needs to be loved. 

"Poe,” Ben whimpers. 

”What do you need?” Poe says. 

”Touch me. Please...”

Ben’s dick is perfect, huge in Poe’s small hand, and he makes sure to tell Ben that. “You’re big,” he murmurs. “So well-shaped. So beautiful.”

“Stars, Poe, you feel so good.” A strangled moan. “You’re so small. But so strong.”

Ben comes explosively in his hand. Poe makes sure to memorize Ben when he actually hits orgasm: his arched back and the look on his face somewhere between pain and pleasure, how rosy his cheeks are...

And when Poe prepares him and kriffs him (kriff, but Ben’s so tight and hot around him, and he feels so good and joined with him), touching Ben again between his legs, Ben’s moans are a sign that he’s doing something right. “More, Poe, please...”

Poe can’t deny him. Even as he moves inside Ben, touching him in tandem, hissing in ecstasy as he thrusts into that tight, warm, loving heat, he’s overcome with emotion. Overcome with this universe-shattering adoration for Ben, where he just wants to take away Ben’s pain and show him how wonderful he is. Not just to make him moan in pleasure, but to make him laugh, make him smile. Let him know that Poe’s here, that he can help him, that he loves him more than anything...

”I — I need...”

”Let go, Ben,” Poe murmurs. Ben erupts again in his hand. Whimpering. So beautiful. He spasms around Poe, clenches, and it’s too much. 

”I love you — oh, Ben, I love you so much...”

Poe comes. It’s like everything’s exploded, and he’s so in love with Ben that his thoughts are white hot pleasure and adoration. 

And he relaxes. “That...that wasn’t too much, was it?”

”None of it,” Ben says. “Lie with me?”

”I thought I already did,” Poe says lightly. 

Ben snorts. “I love you too, you wonderful man. I meant snuggle with me.”

Poe does. Ben feels so warm, and he can also tell that Ben’s foolishly relaxed and content.

Now that Poe’s spent from orgasm, and so is Ben, Poe’s love for him doesn’t feel as urgent, as hungry. He feels more serene, more safe. Ben’s breathing next to him, warm and precious and alive, and people haven’t agreed yet about loving a Jedi — but to love Ben is impossible not to do. 


End file.
